Today at Target

[Hogg]

Being the cheap bastard that I am, I have sworn to avoid $ 250/mth electric bills this year as a result of running AC. So I took my cheap ass down to Target to go and buy a fan. I figure I can probably avoid using the AC 50% of this summer and thus cut down on my household overhead.

Upon reaching the fan aisle, I was not suprised to see that the merchandise had been ransacked already. I began to sort through the remnants in an attempt to find something suitable for my needs.

Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed a redneck couple approaching. I'm sure you know the type. The guy was about a buck fifty, jean shorts, a tanktop, hat on backwards covering an overgrown gray mullet that was now tied into a pony tail, grey goatee, a 50/50 bet on whether he had a mouthfull of teeth or not, and then of course his lovely princess followed thereafter.....a real sweathog clad in the most stunning fashions from the clothing rack two departments over, complete with cellulite-laden thighs, and flip flops.

So they converged on the opposite side of the aisle and I began to listen in on their conversation:

He> We need to get us an air conditioner this year, look at this 'un honey.

She> Thats a window fan, that aint an air conditioner

He> Well got-damn look at this one......$ 299, looks pretty damn good

BRRRRRRRRRATTTTT

He>Well got-damn honey, shame on you.

She>(Walking away) Dont try to blame that on me, that was gross

He>(Laughing his ass off at this point)Woman you need to git to the bathroom when you feel one of them coming on

He exits to next aisle, I hear a bit of laughter and then the familiar sounds of swapping spit in that corresponding redneck display of affection by sucking face with tongue in the middle of a store.

Only at Target.

[Ian Smith]

That reminds me, I went to target today with my girl, and while we were looking at the fans she ripped one off, I told her to get to the bathroom, then we both just laughed, I drug her to the next aisle because there was this big ass dude that looked like he didnt appreciate her shitting her pants... Anyways, I gave her a big ole kiss even though she soiled her britches..... Anyways, just wanted to share my experience at Target today also...... :-)

[Bob Smith]

Originally Posted by Ian Smith

That reminds me, I went to target today with my girl, and while we were looking at the fans she ripped one off, I told her to get to the bathroom, then we both just laughed, I drug her to the next aisle because there was this big ass dude that looked like he didnt appreciate her shitting her pants... Anyways, I gave her a big ole kiss even though she soiled her britches..... Anyways, just wanted to share my experience at Target today also...... :-)

LOL! Thats some funny shit, Ian!

Hogg, that must only be at Targets in your area. That sounds way too much like a Walmart or K-mart story to me. BTW, you could install a ceiling fan instead of having those awful floor fans clogging up space.

[boberto]

Did the store have any display fans on or did you just stand there and relish in that fine redneck ladies sent, what did she eat? can you tell us???? Or were you fortunate enough to be in a target that has display fans that possibly blew the stinch over one aisle, yes the same aisle they rushed off to? Finally, did you buy a fan or was getting fanned in some redneck shit enough to convince you that ac isn't so bad after all.........

[Hogg]

Originally Posted by Bob Smith

LOL! Thats some funny shit, Ian!

Hogg, that must only be at Targets in your area. That sounds way too much like a Walmart or K-mart story to me. BTW, you could install a ceiling fan instead of having those awful floor fans clogging up space.

I already have a ceiling fan in the master bedroom. I need a window fan for my study.

[Hogg]

Ian you twat, figures you would pull a reversal on my moment of glory

I could not smell her perfume or lack thereof, I was constantly bombarded by the smell of beer emanating from this fellow's pores.

[ramboj70]

Originally Posted by Hogg

Ian you twat, figures you would pull a reversal on my moment of glory

I could not smell her perfume or lack thereof, I was constantly bombarded by the smell of beer emanating from this fellow's pores.

50 bucks says you both wanted to eat them out after that, LOL

[Hogg]

I prefer immigrant mexican women that smell like a wheelbarrow full of rotten mackerel.

[eleven11]

spay and neuter. I'm a firm believer than some should not breed...........11

[Bob Smith]

Originally Posted by eleven11

spay and neuter. I'm a firm believer than some should not breed...........11

If they come from south of the Mason-Dixon....

[chris gordon]

Originally Posted by Bob Smith

If they come from south of the Mason-Dixon....

watch that shit... remember we are better armed down here now

[Hogg]

Originally Posted by chris gordon

watch that shit... remember we are better armed down here now

LOL, still flying the flag eh Flash? How 'bout you sing us a little 'Camptown Races' while you're making up them fritters.....come on now boy, entertain us.

Bet my money on the bobtail nag, do-dah, do-dah

[Bob Smith]

Originally Posted by chris gordon

watch that shit... remember we are better armed down here now

And less educated, so whats your point?

[Hogg]

Originally Posted by Bob Smith

And less educated, so whats your point?

BWAAHAHAAAA!!!

[crewboss]

Originally Posted by Hogg

LOL, still flying the flag eh Flash? How 'bout you sing us a little 'Camptown Races' while you're making up them fritters.....come on now boy, entertain us.

Bet my money on the bobtail nag, do-dah, do-dah

all da live long night, all da live long day.... come on now everyone join in!