one more thng about sex and marriage

[mxim]

first off,
its a woman's duty to satisfy her man/ when a man and women get married they are making vows to one another. sex is a need,its a natural desire and for a women to take that away,its just plain selfish. it goes both ways,when i had low T problems,i made damn sure i addressed them in order to satisfy my wife,although she never complained. sex should not be dictated my one person;we can have sex only when i let you! what kind of a relationship is that. even though you are really in the mood and i'm not,i am not going to even attempt to please you,go satisfy yourself and leave me alone,i';m tired. by the way,do not go out and get it somewhere else,we're married,you should just suffer. thats basically what a women is telling us. also,never resort to begging,i never had to and will not start now. 2 people that live together and love each other but don't have sex are called brother and sister,not husband and wife.the only thing that differentiates the two is intimacy. i just simply say this;"i am not happy with the fact that we rarely have sex,if you are happy with that,thats your decision but i am letting you know,for the record that i don't like it and i'm serious;the ball is now in your court". also guys,forget about decorating a room with flowers and all that bullshit,either your wife is attracted to you and wants to have sex,or she is'nt. i can say if she has resentment built up because she is mad at you ar if she has some sort of medical problem,thats different. i would say this to your wives,you don't want to have sex with me but expect me to be faithful,which i am? you think thats fair? if you do then we have a HUGE problem.i am not mentioning this again,i am letting you know how serious an issue this is and its up to you to do something about it.

[SPE]

Originally Posted by mxim

first off,
its a woman's duty to satisfy her man/ when a man and women get married they are making vows to one another. sex is a need,its a natural desire and for a women to take that away,its just plain selfish. it goes both ways,when i had low T problems,i made damn sure i addressed them in order to satisfy my wife,although she never complained. sex should not be dictated my one person;we can have sex only when i let you! what kind of a relationship is that. even though you are really in the mood and i'm not,i am not going to even attempt to please you,go satisfy yourself and leave me alone,i';m tired. by the way,do not go out and get it somewhere else,we're married,you should just suffer. thats basically what a women is telling us. also,never resort to begging,i never had to and will not start now. 2 people that live together and love each other but don't have sex are called brother and sister,not husband and wife.the only thing that differentiates the two is intimacy. i just simply say this;"i am not happy with the fact that we rarely have sex,if you are happy with that,thats your decision but i am letting you know,for the record that i don't like it and i'm serious;the ball is now in your court". also guys,forget about decorating a room with flowers and all that bullshit,either your wife is attracted to you and wants to have sex,or she is'nt. i can say if she has resentment built up because she is mad at you ar if she has some sort of medical problem,thats different. i would say this to your wives,you don't want to have sex with me but expect me to be faithful,which i am? you think thats fair? if you do then we have a HUGE problem.i am not mentioning this again,i am letting you know how serious an issue this is and its up to you to do something about it.

mxim, so much more goes into sex with women than with men. If a woman is not into having sex with her husband and it's a constant thing, then something is wrong with the relationship. Women tend to overanylize things and men tend to underanylize. To men, the answer is simple. Have sex. To women, it's much, much more complicated. Put yourself in her shoes and address the root of the problem. It's probably not sex.

[MANWHORE]

My wife and i haven't been bumpin uglies for some time now so she said it was ok for me to bring girls home and have sex with them .. She said as long as i bring them home and she can watch to make sure i don't stick my pee pee in any dirty holes,i can bring home up to 5 women at one time .. Believe that? Nah me either .. What was the point of this post anyway?

[HeadDoc]

Originally Posted by SPE

mxim, so much more goes into sex with women than with men. If a woman is not into having sex with her husband and it's a constant thing, then something is wrong with the relationship. Women tend to overanylize things and men tend to underanylize. To men, the answer is simple. Have sex. To women, it's much, much more complicated. Put yourself in her shoes and address the root of the problem. It's probably not sex.

great response. When I work clinically with women who have "cheated" on their husbands, it's rarely about the sex. A little bit of sensitive listening with an emotionally unhappy married woman and it's real easy to steal someone's honey! Ask your wives about their friends who have cheated, this is the story you'll hear.

[MANWHORE]

Originally Posted by HeadDoc

great response. When I work clinically with women who have "cheated" on their husbands, it's rarely about the sex. A little bit of sensitive listening with an emotionally unhappy married woman and it's real easy to steal someone's honey! Ask your wives about their friends who have cheated, this is the story you'll hear.

Yeah my wife isn't happy with her body since the baby which is one thing but what bothers her the most is that i need to help more with my son .. She said she wants sex alot but she doesn't like me very much alot .. well we are doing better now .. i thought we were most of the time because she won't complain,she doesn't want to get me mad but i now see what is happening. We have been kissing on the lips alot lately which wasn't happening much the last few months and even cuddleing the last few days. I did tell he i really do love her which made her feel really good because i wasn't saying it much lately .. Now i just can't wait until we get some time .. very tired from the hospital just got back today ... and we will be doing the nasty very soon .. I'm going to try to do my best to make it past 30 seconds but i can't promiss her anything LOL .. I am also thinking about her more and other women alot less so that's a change for the better .. . I love her and want to spend the rest of my life with her so we will make it work. It's not really that hard considering we really are in love with ea other .. A man can be mad at a women but if he's horney he probably won't have a problem havening sex with her. not the other way around .. I thought i knew women pretty good but my wife taught me alot the last few months . They really do have feelings and actually care about little things that i would usually take for granted. As long as i am pumped up with androgens and she with estrogens,we will never agree on everything and may argue alot but we know deep down what we mean to each other .. OK let me get a tissue real quick,i can't see what i'm typing ... Can't wait to get laid man .. I'm like a virgin again .. When ever we wait weeks or even months it always hurts her the 1st 5 minutes or so .. makes me feel damn good i must admitt

[mxim]

headdoc,
plenty of men listen to their wives and are very attentive and romantic. there seems to always be an excuse,where does it end,when your 90!

[RLDubbya]

Wives.

Don't they realize that the wedding dress is white to symbolize their role as a household appliance, dispensing sex at the push of a button?

[HeadDoc]

Originally Posted by mxim

headdoc,
plenty of men listen to their wives and are very attentive and romantic. there seems to always be an excuse,where does it end,when your 90!

When does what end? I know couples in their 60's and 70's who have sex regularly. Satisfying sex among the geriatric group may and does mean oftentimes something different than "hittin' it". Ever wonder why you see this crowd at the buffets in the midday. Ever wonder how they spent the afternoons after such of big meal! Ah, probably not. Well, they truly know the meaning of "afternoon delight".

One of the keys to maintaining a good sex life in your thirties and forties (I am assuming the that represents the modal age group here, is understanding love, arrousal, and connection from your spouses point of view. Also, what are her energy levels like? All of us here love the gym. We pay attention of our nutrition so that it keeps our energy high. Do our wives do the same?

Woman these days work, raise kids, and take care of hoursholds. Alot of these ladies, just pass out at the end of the day. If this is your case, consider the following. Maybe your attentiveness and listening is not working because she is just too tired to attend. Discuss this with her in a non-hostile manner. If she concurs, try adding acts of personal service to your loving repertoire. You do dinner and the get the kids thru the evening. Let her take a bath after dinner. Let her sit and read a book or make some personal choice of her time. Pat Love, PhD, who wrote "Hot Monogamy", told of how she personally discovered how her husband could reliably get into her pants with acts of personal service--being picked up at the airport is a winner for her! This was after, by the way, a trial of superphysiologic doses of test. were tried and rejected as means to solve the problem between her husband and herself.

[liljunior]

guys,

If you think your going to get an answer about this, you're dead wrong. How many jokes are there about this sort of thing?
Mate, the more you address the problem, the less you will get.

She has the power. Worse yet, she knows it. Shes got you wrapped around her little finger. And she knows that to..
Don't get upset with what I'm saying cause I'm not having a dig...I'm telling the truth.
I have been married and before we were at it 3 times a day, after I got married it would be lucky if it was 3 times a month.

Best bet? Ignor it. Don't try to get it. Do what you do without trying to have sex. Don't even think about it... I know your prob looking like this buuut if you know in your heart and can be honest to yourself that your being the best husband you can be, fvck em I say. They prob have issues that they either won't tell us or its with us!
Don't lower yourself either, cause she wants a man not a fag to discuss her nail colour!

P.S.
Guys have been trying unsucessfully to get more sex for years...women know this.

[liljunior]

Originally Posted by mxim

headdoc,
plenty of men listen to their wives and are very attentive and romantic. there seems to always be an excuse,where does it end,when your 90!

Exactly.

Ever seen a woman with curly hair leave it curly?
Ever seen a woman with straight hair leave it straight?

Variety mate....thats what it's all about....
Dress up, dress down do something different. play the goddam fireman whatver....
You know her better than we do so.....

but IMO I would never beg or lower myself for it. if she isn't giving it (see? see my wording? Like its hers to give?) .....either replace her or let her know shes on the path to replacement "For a younger model" like, uprgading your car....there a far too many women out there to not get it from somewhere...

[hackskii]

I do think there is some form of control there too.
It is a mans needs to want to have sex.
It is a womans needs to have you listen too.
The listening takes way longer than the sex
Some tradeoff eh?

[pmgamer18]

Originally Posted by liljunior

Exactly.

Ever seen a woman with curly hair leave it curly?
Ever seen a woman with straight hair leave it straight?

Variety mate....thats what it's all about....
Dress up, dress down do something different. play the goddam fireman whatver....
You know her better than we do so.....

but IMO I would never beg or lower myself for it. if she isn't giving it (see? see my wording? Like its hers to give?) .....either replace her or let her know shes on the path to replacement "For a younger model" like, uprgading your car....there a far too many women out there to not get it from somewhere...

Well my wife and I went on a 3 1/2 hr. drive up north over the week end and I brough up our sex life with her many times. Each time she answered questions with I don't know. I ask her if she lost her libido and does not care to have sex anymore. She says no her libido is fine so I ask what is the problem then why do we only have sex once a week and I have to push for that. She says we have sex more then once a week WTF is with that I told her if she is having sex more then once a week how is it and ask him to help pay some of the bills. I took some time with out pressing the issue to much but I more or less layed it out for her that I am not going to spend what yrs. I have left with a women that dose not want to have sex. She says we do have sex I told what kind of sex do you call this when I have to press the issue to get some and you lay there like just get it over with. I told her I am not going to live the last yrs. of my life like this we need to get to the bottom of this or I am out of here. Just who the hell puts it in there heads that when you reach 60 your to old to have sex. I feel she is not feeling right and does not injoy sex anymore and told her she better tell her Dr. how she feels and get checked up to see if something is off. I let her know that I am not living like this. When I was sick with low T and HIGH E2 I made sure we were having sex even thou I had to use a pump and ring to have sex we had it and she never knew I could not reach an orgasm. I had a ream job on my prostate and when I have a orgasm it goes into my bladder so she can't tell if I had an orgasm or not. I made sure when I had problmes that she was taken care of now I can and she could care less. All I can say is WTF.

[1cc]

Phil,

I think you guys would benefit greatly from counselling. It would help resolve this for you very quickly.

[pmgamer18]

Originally Posted by 1cc

Phil,

I think you guys would benefit greatly from counselling. It would help resolve this for you very quickly.

Yes I am one for this I feel it would be the best thing but she will not go. She did say that she did not know that I felt that strong about this and will be getting the tests that SPC recommended for her thyroid hell if her DHEA is low getting that up will make her testosterone go up. She was on HRT for the change but when the big cancer scare came out she stopped it. I feel when she did this is when all of this started happening and it was slow little by little she stopped wanting to have sex. I tell her there are safe ways to do HRT using compounding but she hates taking meds and seeing Dr.'s. I hope this talk we had does some good. Every thing is fine in our life just she one wanting sex. She was never like this when we were younger.

[The_Skeptic]

Originally Posted by pmgamer18

Yes I am one for this I feel it would be the best thing but she will not go. She did say that she did not know that I felt that strong about this and will be getting the tests that SPC recommended for her thyroid hell if her DHEA is low getting that up will make her testosterone go up. She was on HRT for the change but when the big cancer scare came out she stopped it. I feel when she did this is when all of this started happening and it was slow little by little she stopped wanting to have sex. I tell her there are safe ways to do HRT using compounding but she hates taking meds and seeing Dr.'s. I hope this talk we had does some good. Every thing is fine in our life just she one wanting sex. She was never like this when we were younger.

She says her libido is fine, but maybe fine for what she believes the libido of a 60-year-old woman should be. You mentioned in another thread that thanks to your protocol, you now have the libido of a 20-year-old.

So obviously, we're talking a 40-year gap as far as each of your self-described libidos.

I've read that low doses of T can greatly increase a woman's libido. Would she consider giving that a try?

Maybe with the both of you on a TRT protocal, the sex issue can easily be resolved.

You say that everything else in the relationship is fine, and from what I've read on your previous posts, it's not like she's pissed off at you for not helping around the house or anything. So maybe the issue is more of a physical issue than a mental or emotional issue.

Also, do you think the recent death of her mother might have something to do with this? Stress can greatly affect sex.